The Pig's Tale and The Sad Potato Story.

 In a land far, far away Sir Gandolf was given a fiefdom of 3,000 acres and 30 serf families as the reward for his success in battling the evil Sauron.

As Sir Gandolf settled down to his breakfast of kippers and a nice slab of waygu, he spoke to Gaston de Fidelis the Steward of his manor.

"Why don't we have any pigs as part of the tax from the serfs? I would love some bacon to go along with my low-carb single slice of toast slathered with that freshly churned butter."

Gaston bowed slightly and replied "Sir, the serfs let their pigs run wild, in the forests and behind their houses. The pigs eat anything and everything. They are not kept in a pasture. The serfs slaughter and salt them privately. We are unable to count the numbers, so we can't tax the serfs."

"That's totally unacceptable. It's totally unfair evasion of tax. It's depriving me of that lovely bacon and ham." said Sir Gandolf in a cold soft voice.

Gaston replied "Sir, you are absolutely right, all the lords have spoken on this problem."

Sir Gandolf finished his breakfast in deep thought. Gaston knew better than to interrupt the contemplation, it's best to await his lord's enlightened conclusion.

"Gaston, draft a Bill for The Banning of Pig Rearing by Serfs, circulate it for discussion amongst the elite lords, then for subsequent presentation to His Majesty for approval. That should stop this nonsense."

"Sir, I will see to that immediately." said Gaston.

Sir Gandolf rose from his breakfast table, pleased with his sharp decisive problem solving, then went for a walk.

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While he was taking a short cut on the way back to the manor, he kicked over a potato in the dirt patch behind a serf's hut. He looked the object and went to talk with Gaston.

"What's with those potatoes growing behind the serfs' huts?" asked Sir Gandolf.

"Sir, That's the other problem with serfs." replied Gaston. He continued "Tubers are underground in the dirt behind their huts and not in marked fields. The potatoes are dug up in small numbers for use in a meal, not in an annual harvest. Our tax accountant is unable to count and tax such tuber crops."

"Gaston, Gaston." 

"Just add a Mandate That All Serfs can only grow cereal crops like wheat and barley, to the proposal on pig banning."

"Sir, an excellent suggestion. I will see to that immediately." said Gaston happily.

"Measurement. The Key to Fame, Power and Wealth." Sir Gandolf said as he retired to the library to look at the pretty illustrations in that rather salacious manuscript that had arrived yesterday from France.